My blog has been delinquent so long that I feel like I am meeting it again for the first time. The question is: Why have I neglected posting for so long. Here’s the answer: NOISE. In the midst of all the noise, I have become less and less driven by a reason to create. It is difficult to spend up to a year on a project and release it to the world only to hear a thudding sound.
As a creator (actually as a human being) my mind is full of a constant onslaught of challenges. I have decided to use my blog as a place to post a log of my creative struggles and triumphs. In the future, you can expect a series of more honest, more frequent posts. They may seem fragmented, but that is because my mind functions like a fragmented mess.
I realize that this more personal approach to my blog doesn’t have the appeal of a slick, educational series of articles. Honestly, that’s not what I’m about anyways. So I’m tearing down the walls. And I plan to write about it.
I do suffer from a unrequited compulsion to create. And when I am not creating, I suffer from deep bouts of depression. Creativity, hence, acts like a monkey on my back. This doesn’t set me apart from anyone else in the world. We all have a monkey and it rides our shoulders with it’s crop and chattering shrills.
I guess I’m trying to dispel the whole emotionally struggling creator thing. I could just as easily be a struggling businessman, a struggling single parent, a struggling addict, a struggling millionaire, a struggling homeless man, or a struggling humanitarian (name your poison). Creativity for me is a bitter/sweet thing. I know that you have your bitter/sweet thing too and I am not going to discredit the trials of those around me by saying mine are somehow more profound than yours. It comes down to this: we all have our trials. You show me yours, I’ll show you mine.
Mine will be written here for all to read.